Ive come to a point in my poker career when I am not motivated to play anymore. I have basically accomplished everything I wanted. I would normally use this time to set new, higher goals, but I haven't had the motivation. I don't know what/why this happened to me. I am one of the hardest working people I know when I get motivated and passionate about doing something. I only play tournaments one day a week and never grind any live cash. I am at a point where I don't know where to go or what to do about it.
I watched a few motivational speeches online trying to find something inspirational, and failed. I did however come across something rather unusual. While reading Doyle Brunsons new autobiography "The God Father of Poker" , I read something that jumped out at me. There was a point in Doyles life where he lost his first daughter and was very upset about it. He never was a religious man, but his wife was. He had an empty void in his life and couldn't fill it. He even stopped playing poker for over a year because of this tragedy, so he decided to give religion a try. Now I was brought up as a Christian, but I never enjoyed going to church with my family. I definitely think a big part of it was because I was forced to go, and almost like anything in life, if your forced to do something, you probably don't enjoy doing it. Well Doyle started praying and going to church and also had bible study classes at his own house. A lot of his fellow poker friends started coming to them, and these guys were not religious at all. He said a few of them with very bad drug and drinking addictions actually stopped for the rest of their lives! Not only that but he filled the void in him and got back on with his life. I have been thinking maybe I need something spiritual in my life to fill this void and get more motivated in life. I don't know if its right for me, but I think I am going to give it a try. Hey, it can't hurt right.
I have been watching some videos lately on mixed games and am becoming more interested in learning how to play them. A new goal I want to set for myself is to play the 50k 8game next year at the wsop. Hopefully I can be motivated enough to accomplish that one.
I have been working out for the first time in years lately and starting to feel a lot better. It's keeping me away from eating out all the time and also eating poorly. I am unhappy with the way I have become over the past year since really getting into poker seriously. I have put on some weight and basically become an alcoholic. I always drank a shit ton in college but this has actually gotten worse. Luckily I am smart and strong enough to realize this and actually make a change in my life. Hopefully I can keep motivated to stay on this new track.
I am definitely excited for the Ftops 2k 6max on saturday and for the big juicy sunday tournaments! After that I plan on going to LA for the WPT Legends a week from today. Then I have no idea what I am doing as I plan on moving out of the mansion in which i currently reside and possibly move to Miami for a month or two to grind cash. I think a new scene will help me get back on track and I am willing to try new things. I am thinking about going to London at the end of September for Wsope. I am also planning on playing in both wsop circuits in Indiana in October, and visiting back in ohio between the two. Who knows though, I live my life one day at a time and without any regrets.